Bad Bird Reviews: Northern Cardinal
- Zach (Head Flocker)
- Apr 7
- 4 min read
A Northern Cardinal's bite is much worse than its bark. Luckily, most fingers are not attached to sunflower seeds. Prepare thyself, a Bad Bird Review is coming.
Red means go. As in, GO SUBSCRIBE to Flocking Around!
Whenever I go hunting for an overly ridiculous review to include from one of our national parks, I do not have to search long. Apparently, some people cannot accept the simple beauties in life, especially if they cannot capture them with their "photography skills." As we can see from Matthew (Oh, and it snows in the Rocky Mountains in October. That is a thing. A common, logical thing.):
"Wildlife is not as photogenic as I would have hoped. Was snowing in October?? A local told me that happens around here and went back to eating his gluten free Paleo vegan avocado toast."
I cannot create fake reviews better than the gold unappreciative tourists provide to national parks. But by godwit, I will give it a try. Sit down, grab some popcorn, hide your phone screen, and don't change that dial. This Bad Bird Review of the Northern Cardinal begins... now!
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Northern Cardinals LOVE sunflower seeds!
Bad Bird Reviews: The Northern Cardinal, the Showbird of the Woods
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"Nawthen? Nothin Nawthen about em."
Ah live an' grosse tete louisiana. Ain't nothing nawthen about da cardinals an dese parts. Dese birds are as suthen as dey come. bless dey hearts.
(Translation: I live in Grosse Tete, Louisiana. There is nothing northern about the cardinals in these parts. These birds are as southern as they come. Bless their hearts.)
Background: Two things to point out here. I am from Cajun Country in Louisana, and after living in the plains and mountains for two decades, it takes me three days of immersion before my brain can quickly translate Cajun English to English. Second point: The Northern Cardinal is found in the northern Americas. United States folk often forget that there are multiple Americas; we are only the northernmost of the three. The Northern Cardinal is found from southern Mexico to Canada, mostly east of the Great Plains.
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"Time for a makeover for the females"
Someone needs to take female cardinals for an 80s-style montage of a makeover. They are dull brown with only a few hints of red. MORE RED!
Background: The Northern Cardinal is sexually dichromatic. Males are brightly colored, and females are dull and more strongly camouflaged. The bright red color is from pigments derived from a cardinal's diet during its feather growth process (called a molt).
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"Ugly duckling"
I saw a cardinal feeding its baby and it was UGLYYYYYYY
Background: Cardinal nests are often parasitized by Brown-headed Cowbirds. The female cowbird will remove cardinal eggs and lay her own egg(s) in the nest. Then, the cardinal pair will raise the young cowbird as their own. (Additionally, juvenile cardinals do not have the striking plumage of either adult.)
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"Sitting around all day"
Do these birds do anything other than sit and eat?!
Background: A study of a captive flock measured the daily time budget for Northern Cardinals during the non-breeding season. They spent their time: 74% perching, 13% feeding, and 5% flying.
Cardinals prefer tray and platform feeders!
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"GOLDEN CARDINAL??"
I saw a cardinal that was all yellow. not red at all. I thought they were all red??
Background: Yellow-colored Northern Cardinals have popped up a few times throughout their range. This aberrant plumage (weird plumage) is due to a mutation (see: xanthochroism) that prevents the bird from converting foods to red pigments and, instead, converts to yellow pigments.
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"Singing a lullaby!"
I saw a female singing a lullaby to its chicks in the nest! How sweet! And while she was singing, a male even fed her!
Background: Female cardinals (like most birds) can and do sing somewhat regularly. Studies indicate that some of the female cardinals' songs occur on the nest, and they can tell the male when to bring food and when to stay away. (A bright red bird would attract unwanted attention at the nest.)
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"The case of the missing thumb"
What a nasty bite! One flew into my window, and I picked it up to put it into a box to take to a rescue. IT BIT ME SO HARD I WAS BLEEDING!
Background: Ornithologists who have held a cardinal as part of a banding project understand that the bite of this bird is one of the most painful. Side note: If a bird hits a window, please get it to a bird rehabber ASAP, then consider treating your windows to prevent future collisions.
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"Where are MY cardinals?!"
I just moved to Idaho and there are no cardinals anywhere?! What happneed
Background: Sadly, Northern Cardinals are not regularly found west of the Great Plains. However, their range has been shifting for the past 50+ years, and they are now found further north and west than historically recorded!
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"Always seen AND heard!"
These cardinals are almost too much for me. They are bright red, always fighting, singing, and showing off. I prefer my birds more demure. They all need to visit the Milford Academy. You can always tell a Milford Man.
Background: Northern Cardinals often sit on prominent perches, sing clear, loud songs, and are brightly colored. These attributes frequently make them favored by backyard bird feeders! Though, male cardinals that nest within 100 m of a Cooper's Hawk nest will sing from less-exposed perches!
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Personal Review of the Northern Cardinal
The Northern Cardinal is a fan favorite of many folks with feeders in their backyard. I appreciate their song and photogenic behavior. They are frequent visitors to bird feeders filled with sunflower seed and are adapting reasonably well to human alterations to the landscape. If you have a pair near you, hold tight to them!
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